other side of the wall

other side of the wall

You can scroll the shelf using and keys

Exultation

April 4, 2014

 “Mama exhorted her children at every opportunity to ‘jump at de sun.’ We might not land on the sun, but at least we would get off the ground.” -Zora Neale Hurston, Dust Tracks on a Road, 1942

They said come to America.

Take opportunity and grow.

Take opportunity to prosper.

Mummy said I’ll go,

and like lava soaked diamond

the world will crack me

open. I’ll be worth something

more than I could be

in oil stained soils

dripping red from greed.

Flee from this achromatic calling

a woman must heed

and give birth to in the dust.

No, “Go! Go! Go”,

she cries. “You must!”

I pack her unborn dreams,

the seeds she never planted

and crossed an ocean

to have my wishes granted.

Mummy, I have arrived.

This place is not easy.

Much work to do

Before I can shine.

Mummy, “Ese gan.”

Mummy, Thank you.

This is no easy sacrifice.

“Mon ‘ife e”- I love you.

© 2014 Leenadria

 

Walk A Day in My Shoes

April 4, 2014

Sidewalk art my the boys did together a few years ago. Cancer is such a disgusting disease. I don’t know if there are eloquent words to express this sentiment. I just pray for grace and mercy as we journey through the more difficult times we are facing. 

Midnight Snack

April 2, 2014

Gray

Curl up in the reclining chair

next to the hospital bed

scoffing at eight hour old dinner,

I offer and you shake your head.

 

I miss home but I would be

wherever you were so

I pull the blanket up over me;

anchor the bottom with my toe.

 

I contemplate eating your old,

cold, fried chicken finger but

alas I find some sense of self

respect; still grumbling in my gut.

 

They pump you with chemo

Why do they serve this crap anyway?

Stupid blanket won’t stay put.

Screw it, I’m going to be cold anyway.

 

Check to see you’re sleeping peaceful

and find myself shuffling down the hall

seeking the nourishment I left in the fridge.

It better be there because I’m eating it all.

 

Fling the door open and search for

my labeled morsels; a treat just for me

search over popsicles and hot dogs

where is my little container of therapy?

 

A few minutes later, I shuffle back to my room

smiling at awake nurses along the way

self-respect a distant memory in my quest,

but I have no explanation, nothing to say.

 

Check to see you’re still sleeping peaceful.

Fix your blankets and prop up your pillows.

Seated, drape the blanket over my legs

to eat my cookie dough ice cream sorrows.

© 2014 by Leenadria

 

Diagnosis

March 27, 2014

nic

Nine-eleven, no it was

nine-twelve-o-nine

the day the sky cracked open.

Do you recall?

I distinctly remember everything

and then nothing at all.

 

©2014 by Leenadria

Just 10 more minutes…

January 25, 2014

 

I’d like to pull the sun down

like a window shade.

Just fold blue sky over it

until it’s night again,

and I’m tucked in again

dreaming of him again.

Nothing needs to happen today

that can’t happen tomorrow.

Tuck the bright lights away.

Pull the night up over me

because he was dancing with me;

twirling, romancing with me.

While the morning protests

it will not fold back into night,

just yet…

© 2014 Leenadria

Measure of a Man

January 25, 2014

Of Faith in the Valley

November 25, 2012

Of Faith in the Valley

Your perfect love, a limitless valley.

You submit and give unknowingly.

Bearing unfairly weighted burdens,

in each moment without pretense.

You live with exhilaration, and

though the days have aged our

sensibilities, somehow  our spirituality,

you draw us into Him.

In spite of ourselves, we find ourselves-

grateful.

Intense warmth. Recognition.

Knowing He sees us. Proving His truth,

the reality of His stake in us.

Desperate attempts to ignore Him

in disapproval of this chosen task.

Our souls scream at the incompatibility.

Yet you complain not.

Only asking with an outreached hand

that we stand with you.

You open yourself willingly;

unconcerned with that which is to come.

We watch. We think we can feel.

Desperate prayers pour from our mouths

over you, consume you. With our eyes,

we ask too much. Your hand on my face.

Your love reciprocated again.

You give; and we will continue to take;

to delight in you; to bathe in your

laughter. Our delicate bridge.

A bond to Him, we have thus far

been unable to deny.

© 2011 Leenadria